Crystal Bra

Video Dump: The Funny People on Vine

If you haven’t heard of Vine, well you’re in luck because no one’s really judging you … yet, because it’s one of those fairly new apps that’s just now getting a lot of attention.  What Twitter is to Facebook, Vine is to YouTube – it’s basically an app that will let you post 6 seconds videos of whatever you want and like Twitter, it forces people to get creative with their videos and a lot of people have stepped up to the Vine plate.  Entertaining and funny all in six seconds?  It doesn’t sound possible but Vine makes it happen.

Here’s just a few hilarious Vine videos we found that’ll make you want to jump on the Vine bandwagon.

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER DRIVER BY WILL SASSO

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER DRIVING BY WILL SASSO

BEST OF VINE APRIL 2013

RYAN GOSLING WON’T EAT HIS CEREAL

WIZKHALIFA’S VINE COMPLIATION

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The 5 Biggest Video Game Flops

THE VIDEO GAME INDUSTRY is massively huge, a multi-billion dollar a year behemoth that makes a lot of money for a lot of people.

But not every new system takes off. Not every game sells. Some products are rushed to market, others are poorly designed, and others are ill conceived.

For every spectacular success there are spectacular failures, like these ones:

1. RCA Studio II

 

One of the earliest entrants in the home console market, the RCA Studio II, was also one of the emerging market’s first commercial failures.

One of the biggest problems facing the Studio II was the competition, specifically the Fairchild Channel F which came with equipped with two joysticks—the Studio II had two ten-button keyboards built into the console leaving players fight for elbow room—was launched first, rendering the Studio II obsolete before release.

The death blow came 10-months later with Atari released its 2600 and took the gaming world by storm, establishing the home console market we know today and ending production on the Studio II.

2. Nokia N-Gage

 

You can see how this product came about, couple guys sitting around in Finland one day at the Nokia factory in the early 2000s playing a handheld video game device suddenly think “Why the hell don’t we make a phone that is also a portable console?”

Unfortunately Nokia failed to make a product that could perform either function well. The thing looked like a taco, had to be held sideways to work as a phone and failed to meet the standards set by its competition in the portable video game console world. The N-Gage was a smashing failure, selling less than 3 million units in 3 years after anticipating they’d move 2-3 million in the first year.

Nokia scrapped the N-Gage in 2007 and has stuck to making phones and steadily losing its market share ever since.

3. Nintendo Power Glove

The Power Glove is most likely a victim of being rushed to market to correspond with the movie The Wizard—which fans will recall also launched Super Mario Bros. 3—and technology not having caught up with its designers imagination.

The idea was that you could drive cars or fly planes or punch bad guys with the glove, but the reality was that you basically just had a controller strapped to one wrist and were now forced to play one handed. Great idea, horrible execution.

The Power Glove was basically supposed to offer all the free-flowing control that the Wii finally allowed, some 15 years later—so at least Nintendo got it right eventually.

4. Duke Nukem Forever

It certainly took “forever” to create!

This beauty was 15 years in the making, and the game delivered on none of the promises. It was the follow up to a successful series that changed hands and engines and designers so many times over the course of its development its difficult to know whose responsible for what, or who lost money and how much.

What is certain is that the wait was not worth it. The game topped many “most disappointing game of the year” lists back in 2011, and if you didn’t even realiZe it had been released in 2011, well you certainly weren’t alone, hardly anyone bought this thing.

Seems like most people gave up on this game at least a decade before it was released, except the developers and they’re the ones still paying the price for it.

5. Daikatana

When a game producer decides that the ad campaign for the game should use his name instead of the name of the game, you know that ego might be an issue. And when said producer makes a threat/promise to gamers, he better deliver or they’ll make him their bitch! And make him their bitch they did!

The only thing people liked about this game was the poster and only after the game turned out to be garbage and they could turn on Romero.

Not surprisingly production ran into trouble, there were numerous delays and rampant over-spending and in the end. An inferior product that was couldn’t hold a candle to Doom and was most definitely failed to live up to the hype as the next big thing in first person shooters.

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Marloes Horst and Sylvie van der Vaart Do the Double Dutch


Not long ago, we praised the excellence of Dutch women, especially the supermodel kind. Well, supermodels ought to be pretty excellent no matter where they’re from, but it’s inarguable that, on a per-capita basis, the Netherlands pumps out way more supermodels and models than any other country. The Netherlands ranks 62nd in terms of population. If it were a U.S. state, it would come in fifth behind California, Texas, New York and Florida. So how come there’s so many world-class hot chicks coming out of the Netherlands?

We don’t know. Something in the water? This would take years of scrutiny (combing through literally tons of old Swimsuit Issues and Victoria’s Secret catalogs) and some lab work (“Open up, Miss Kroes, we need to take a swab — for science”).

We’d much rather just study the girls one by one — but even that presents a problem. They’re coming at us too fast! We were looking at these new photos of Marloes Horst and Sylvie van der Vaart and having trouble deciding which of them was most important to serve you today. Marloes or Sylvie? Sylvie or Marloes?

Conclusion: Fuck it, do ‘em both. Because next week there will be another smokin’ hot batch of Dutch femininity that needs your attention. Sometimes you just have to go Double Dutch and move on.

















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Inevitably, when we use “Double Dutch” to refer to people, we have to wonder… when they do the double dutch, is that really them dancing? We’ve never figured that out. Liz Phair thought so in 1994, and as you can see with this VHS-duped video from 120 Minutes the woman was ahead of her time. We have celebrity upskirt and pokies years before these things became the primary content of the internet. This from the woman who had a nipslip on her own album cover. This will be your earworm for the day, enjoy:

Related on The Smoking Jacket:
Dioni Tabbers Is a Curvy Provocateuse in Agent Provocateur
Meet Beautiful Dutch Playmate Zimra Geurts

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TUESDAY TEASE Is Just Getting Started

Unable to bear the thought of having to spend an entire week waiting for it to end, we thought we’d ask all the fun and sexy girls who pose for us to help bring you a new day to celebrate Playboy models at the beginning of the week. That’s right. We love you like that. We dubbed our day: #TuesdayTease. 

We’re proud to bring the brand new weekly feature, #TuesdayTease, where our Cybergirls, Playmates, and Playboy’s hottest fans tweet out their sexiest selfies for your viewing pleasure.

TUESDAY TEASER

Wanna take part? You just have to tweet your photo to @PlayboyDotCom with the hashtag #TuesdayTease and we’ll post your sexy pics right here.

We’re all doing our part to make the world a better place, after all.

Happy #TuesdayTease!

CLICK HERE TO ACCESS THE FULL GALLERY 


CLICK HERE TO ACCESS THE FULL GALLERY

 

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Petra Nemcova “Wild Orchid” Lingerie Photoshoot

Petra Nemcova “Wild Orchid” Lingerie Photoshoot.

 

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